My Friends Amaze Me

My view for many weeks while my friends visited me in hospital.

​As a romance author, I’m passionate about the magic of romantic love. But in my life, I’ve found that in friendship love there is magic also. Love is what makes any relationship a gift. In the past, I have shared my journey of finding romantic love with Sam. But I learned a valuable lesson about love in the weeks before I met him.

I went through a very testing time, both physically and mentally. My body and brain had crashed, and I was admitted to the hospital. Bouquets of flowers arrived, and my sister stayed with me every day from morning to night. There wasn’t much keeping me clinging on to life but love.

My sister's love gave me the strength to endure the pain and keep breathing. My friends came to see me, and I saw love in their concern for me. But what amazed me was that after the crisis had passed my close friends kept coming to see me through a slow recovery. Even when the weeks turned into a month, every day or two I had a friend arrive and sit with me. To me they're real life heroines.

In my addled state I wondered, why are they coming when I can’t be amusing or do anything for them. All I could do was smile and say a few words while they told me about what was happening in their lives. I always felt a bit better after every visit. I came to the conclusion that they must love me. That me - the person, was enough. I didn’t have to do anything to be loved. Even when I could barely speak enough to put a sentence together.

This photo was taken the night I won best unpublished manuscript for the category section of the RWAustralia's Emerald award. It shows how ill I was three months before the crisis point.

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​That profound thought amazed me. I hadn’t realized I’d held a belief that I needed to do something to be loved. I only needed to be myself, whatever that was.

I cherish those dear girlfriends who kept turning up and being a lifeline for me. Their empathy and patience and steadfastness is such a gift that I’ll treasure always. They’re still in my life turning up regularly, and I am now able to do it for them too.

Last night one of those dear women arrived for a casual pasta dinner while her husband was at the football. When I opened the door, Michelle surprised me with a bunch of sweet smelling, ruffly, pink stock. I was amazed. I told her she didn’t have to do that and she said, "Well, you ‘re giving me dinner, and I wanted to."

She’s the inspiration for this post. It’s not the flowers, it’s the giving spirit that fills me with gratitude for everything I’ve received from my loving friends.